Curiosity—and courage—sometimes looks like leaving the dough on the counter for the night. “There may be more going on than I can see.” Leave it unfinished, a “prayer for tomorrow” as Ross Gay would say. This is one way to learn to read the stars.

Chance swims in the waters of possibility–that’s the hopeful perspective. But it’s not probability. I may “possibly” make it through with my kids still in their house, but I cannot say “probably.” This is not the kind of material that made a Hallmark card your go-to source of inspiration.

In one sense there is the hope that going to hell and continuing on promises that there is a leaving, a coming out at some undisclosed moment. Escape is not the correct word, not any more than the butterfly escapes the chrysalis: hell is just as necessary for our transformation as the chrysalis is for the rotting caterpillar. This realization reminds me that our fascination with the end leaves little room for us to love the process.